BFF, remember I told you that I met a guy named Steve on my way to my colonic session last week? Well, during the course of the week we got to talking.....let me tell you how much I enjoy communicating with Steve....he is so knowledgeable, so passionate when he speaks. Not to mention, he has a nice voice too.........now this is only the beginning......I am not jinxing anything (not like there is anything to jinx), but people always put their good foot forward first to get you interested...........
Our conversations were so very enjoyable. Being that he seems "enlightened" (or at least that is how it appears) and constantly on the hunt for knowledge and truth, it was very easy for us to hold a long conversations. Ahhhhhh what a breath of fresh air (I think I see a cloud or two in the distant sky).
So this is what happened. During the week we communicated every single day....for at least 45 minutes...how exciting....hehe........I was wondering when he was going to ask me out on a date. The day finally came and he asked me out for drinks....or at least that is what I thought was happening........
We misunderstood each other.....I thought he was asking me out on a date.....when in all actuality, he was asking to come over to my place......ahahahahaha....that is cute.....BFF, BFF, BFF, BFF.....by no means do I think that a first date is going to some one's house or them coming to mine. Not to say that I have not done it in the past, but remember, I am trying to change my ways right, lol. You should know me a little by now, so you know I humored this request, but I put a twist on it.....I told him that I would come to his place......listen, I said I humor the bullshit right!?.......
So, last night we agreed that I would go to his place and we would have a nice evening of talking, laughing, drinking, smoking and getting to know each other. BFF, Come deeper into my mind and let me give you some insight on me and my thoughts........I think like this......I associate the night with sex.....I associate meeting someone at their house (or them meeting me at mine) with sex...I am not going to hold my tongue..this is what I believe and from my experiences and the way men have interacted with me at night, I can firmly state that I am not the only person who thinks and associates things like this......I have told people my night-sex theory and some agree, some don't. What do you think?
Being that Steve and I were able to speak freely with each other and it felt like both of us were comfortable with the thought of me coming over, I did not bother to get dressed up. I wore a shirt and a pair of slacks....plus, I did not want to give him any more sexual impressions, it was bad enough I agreed to go to his place and at night to boot!!
We spoke while I drove and our conversation was just as nice as all of the other ones. We made each other laugh and think. I can't lie, I was secretly praying that he would remain the same (if not be better) in person.
I finally got to his "condo" and surprisingly, we were still on the phone, enjoying our conversation. Don't ask me what we were talking about, because I don't remember. All I know is every conversation I have had with him, neither of us can stop laughing and talking with each other.
I could not find parking to save my life. The parking situation was so bad, he came outside to help me find a spot. As we were driving around, we continued to talk.....nothing has changed and I was really enjoying his company in the car. Finally, we found a spot a few blocks away. Not only did I like our conversations, I enjoyed our interaction with each other. His dry sarcasm hit the spot! It felt like we were friends for a few years.
So we got back to his "condo" and to my great surprise.....the evening was going much better than I thought.....we got right into the drinking and smoking.......continued talking......he pointed out some books that he thought I would be interested in reading......not only that....he read from an astrology book and I damn near cried when he was reading the description of my sign (Pisces, we are the BEST!).
Wow, "first home meeting" was turning out to be much more than I expected.........We spoke to and with each other like we had a long lasting friendship..........like we were just friends who normally hung out with each other.....that was until “Homey da Roach” crawled up his table cloth and on the table we were sitting at......that should have been my signal to leave..........even disgusting insects send messages to those who are receptive to the message.........I should have listened and left............lololololololol ahahahahahah! He apologized profusely.....I played it off like it ain't nothing......I know.......I know.......I tolerate the bullshit! Lol
I chose to ignore the roach message..........what can I say......we were having so much fun.............before we knew it, it was 1 o'clock in the morning. Funny how time flies when you're having FUUUUUUNNNN! (sing it with me now! lol) We decided to take our conversation from the dining room table to the couch. Yes, the couch......my thoughts on the couch, the couch is the foreplay spot, before you go to the bedroom.
Although we were vibing (communication wise) and having a great time, I did not feel that "UMPH!". You know that attraction, that love, lust, gonna show you a thing or two attraction? Well, it was not there for me, I am not sure about him. Clarification, there was an attraction on my side, but not that downright dutty sex attraction. I was more attracted to his mind than anything else. Some say that is the way it starts, I say let's see what happens, lol.
Sitting on the couch, I feel a bit strange......yes, I was thinking about what other insect friends he might have, but also, I knew we are going to end up kissing. I wished, I prayed that our kissing styles are compatible. BFF, what the fuck is so damn funny? You never heard of that? Not everyone has the same kissing technique......stop laughing at me......fine, if you think that is funny, keep reading.........
The fun continued even though we moved to another part of his "condo", lol. Yeah, so, that strange feeling I was talking about....well.......my strange feelings are ALWAYS CORRECT! We kissed and it was so fucking disappointing......oh Lawd.........what a fucking waste......ding dangit....I don't care what anyone says, there are certain things that just........they just have to click with me in order for shit to grow. If we don't have compatible kissing styles, if your kiss does not make me weak, make me lose my breath, make me shiver, I just don't, I just can't go any further.........call me what you want......maybe this is one of many reasons I am single........but I am not just going to let "the little things" add up to a "huge thing". This may be little to others, but it is huge to me. Men like a package, so do women. I deserve EVERYTHING I LIKE AND WANT! So there!
But, BUT......yes I continued to kiss him, in hopes that it would get better.........I should have stopped and went home.....went home when "Homey da Roach" decided to join our conversation, but I humored the bullshit........kissing.......me questioning........kissing......us talking.........me rolling my eyes......us talking and laughing...........it was getting late and both of us were starting to fall asleep while talking, lol.
We are adults right? RIGHT? Yes! So, we decided to sleep for a couple of hours, we also wanted to sleep off some of the alcohol.
I know it is not fair to go into a man's bed, have your ass, tits, multiple piercings (ohh, I am talking about me, lol) and bare skin all over him, cuddle and expect him not to want to fuck....I know it is wrong thinking on women's part........I did not want to do that to him, firstly because I did not feel that attraction to him and secondly I did not feel that attraction to him and I was not sure if Homey told his friends and family about me, lol.
We got in bed and it just went downhill from there. If I enjoyed his (nasty) kisses, I would not have minded cuddling with him and being dry humped like a dog in heat, but being that I didn't like his kisses, the attraction was not there and he did not tell me about his "condo mates", when he made advances to kiss me, I pushed him away. BFF, I could handle the horrible kisses, but not the dry humpin......what the fuck.........I know I am not a dog, what the fuck is the dry humpin about......???????
To make matters worse, he had the nerve to start moaning and groaning like he was getting his shit off...........why?... why me?....lolol. The icing, figurines and candles were nicely put on the 15 layer cakes when he said in a very seductive voice, "Baby, put your tongue down there." WHAT? BFF, I know my ears are small, but did I hear correctly. No, No, there was no way in FUCK, that I heard that or that he said that. There was nothing going on for him to say some shit like that. So, I did not respond. As I was forced to lay my head on his chest, lol, I heard him say, "Baby, put your tongue on it." Like I said, I humor the bullshit!!! I picked my head up, looked him right in his eyes and said, "NO". Hoping that that was the end of it, he asked me, "Why?" My first instinct was to say, "Negro, because I don't fucking want to. Why the fuck you gotta mess up a nice evening? Weren't we just have so much fun talking, why you gotta take it there? Why don't put your tongue on my bleeding pussy? How does that sound to you?" My mother did tell me that my mouth would get me in trouble, thank goodness I know how to curb it when I need to. With as much calmness as I could muster at the time, I replied, "Because I don't want to", with my eyebrows pointing down in disgust!
Thankfully, he got the hint and we just slept the rest of the night. Damn, even if everything was to my liking, I would not have sucked his dick.....HOW FUCKING TACKY???..........
For the rest of the morning, we slept peacefully. We both reluctantly and slowly started to wake up around 6 am. That's when the dry humpin started again............You know what, it is my fault.........my thoughts on meeting people where they live or where I live.......my thoughts on meeting at night........see, I know I was not wrong about the sex association and night..............his actions cosigned my perspective........but like I said, this is my fault.........I agreed to go.......I agreed to spend the night.........so everything that transpired I played a participating part in............this goes to show you BFF, if I participate, if I do it, I am not ashamed to admit it..............
I could have easily went home, when I informally met "Homey da Roach". I guess I enjoyed his company and conversation so much that part of me wanted to see the night through completion......wanted to see if he would be a "real gentleman"........"real gentleman" who takes things slow............... who is able to sleep in the same bed with a woman........but he was a "real gentleman" in that he would not stop trying to get what he wanted; well not until he could no longer take rejection..........
I may ask myself "Why Me?" but I know why..............lol..............
